Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Love, 'Old- fashioned', eh?

The other day I caught this debate on ‘We the People’...yeah yeah wahi Barkha Dutt wala show....which was based on live- in relationships and the hullabaloo over the new laws....well more than the theme, what got my attention was this certain term used by a person, who said, “I believe in ‘Old- fashioned’ love.”

You know sometimes, people use expressions so frequently that you get used to hearing them, you barely notice it and then suddenly one day, it goes knock knock, kaun hai on your head and you think.....'Uhh...Ok...What?' I mean isn’t it strange to tag love into two categories of old and new ‘fashion’? Worse, term it like it’s a fad or in vogue for a season! Turns out, I went in for writing an exam and by the time I came out, I was left behind by a whole fashion era!

So if I am to make sense of it, then the ‘old fashioned’ wala’s are the ones who believe in all these filmy stories and fairytales of happily ever after and the ‘lateshtt fashion’ wala’s are the ones who progress with time, prioritize between ‘stuff’ and ‘relationships’ and focus on being practical and realistic. Correct na?

I have a problem with that!

And yes, I understand that nobody could care lesser, but I still wish to say it. Aren’t relationships becoming more of a chutki main chipkaao arrangement?.....A doesn’t work....move to C to wherever. Uh- Oh you don’t know? Honey, that’s fashion!
Whatever happened to honour and commitment???

What’s with all this drama of first endorsing a live- in and then going gaga over your rights? If the whole idea was to retain independence then where does the question of pinning down responsibility come in? Looks like nobody really wants to say it, but the object is merely to back out when the situation gets sticky. And as relates to the terminology used in law...You can actually indulge and we are playing spoilers by merely saying it??

More so, the laws in my opinion together with the law makers seem like they are doing it all for the sake of projection ‘Oh yeah look at us...We are so modern!’.... I mean does it take an insane amount of intelligence to be able to tell right from wrong? If marriage is a ‘holy bond’, then how righteous is it to call ourselves above God? Do we really know better than him? I don’t think so!

I don’t think it’s a ‘to each his own’ concept’s a little more damage than that....I don’t think it’s wrong if children expect normal parents who have a little more shred of substance to their relationship than ‘we live together’.

Yes, I can be disappointingly serious sometimes and I don’t apologise to anyone who wishes to hold contrary views on the subject!


Md. Muddassir Shah said...

You need not apologizeto anyone :)

you are entitled to hold your views.
But nice and debatbale topic.
Let me see if I can come up with something on the same topic :)

Harish said...

Check in.. check out.. live in.. live out.. who want strings after all!

MangoMan said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
MangoMan said...

You're absolutely privileged to your say, stand and views. But then if you think you are encouraging live-ins by thinking like this. I'll tell you why.

You, like a vast majority, hold marriage in such high regards. Great. Now isn't making such a fuss of this business of merely 'signing on a dotted line' actually scaring away the rest of us, the non-judgemental ones? Because marriage is made out to be such a big deal, we don't want to rush into it. (Kyunki agar work out nahi hua to log kya kahenge!). So, take one step at a time and check out the living together compatibility.

Had there been no hoopla regarding the marriage thing, people would have signed on the line and married, only to part ways if things go beyond 'adjustment'.

I don't think one can ever pass judgement on two human beings' respect and feeling for each other merely because they haven't yet 'formalized' it!

See again, isn't making it a bit too 'formal' making things worse. Why not stay madly in love, respect each other, adjust, compromise and then finaly take the plunge and show the same judgemental society that we're NOT one of your favourite jokes - failed love marraiges.

Yeh hua serious!

P.S. Ye Life Hai...Take It Lightly!

Sadiya Merchant said...

@ muddassir- is wat i not apologetic.
n yes i look forward to ur take on it :-))

@ harish- see! dats wat i mean....want no strings, den hav no qualms!

@ mangoman- we dint have the whole concept of a 'test- drive' earlier on, n despite dat ppl managed jus fine in their fiats n ambassadors n maruti 800's! dere! Also, given an honest attempt, ANYTHIN wil wrk! *yes, however long ur statement i wont budge, thnk u*
n @ ps- lol! nice :-)

Anonymous said...

As Muddassir said, "You need not apologizeto anyone :)
Yes, Now a days "it take an insane amount of intelligence to be able to tell right from wrong"

According to me.. Love will remain Love no matter on what time you live, You can't categorize Love based on Era's.. like 'Old Fashioned' and 'New Fashioned'.. Modern and Old etc..

Md. Muddassir Shah said...

I re read your post and you know wat,
I would concur to what you say.
I love the end where you talk of children expecting parents to have some substance in their relationship.
Yes, that makes a huge difference to the children's lives.
But for a genration which lives in PRESENT MOMENT, you think they ll worry about future??

Sadiya Merchant said...

@ sayedkhadri- but im NOT apologising to neone!!
n abt d latter part, love may remain love in theory but its signifance sure seems dwindling :(

@ muddassir- hehe...phew! finally!....n yeah ur rite.... its ironic dat ppl can b so grown up n so immature at the same time!