Sunday, May 23, 2010

Dulhan mil gayi?


A sequel to the previous post. You see I am a neutral person when it comes to politics……and just like other people my temperament, it makes no difference as to who comes in an out of power…..so considering the invaluable services I rendered for the BJP, its only fair that I maintain my neutrality by doing something for the Congress as well….after all they have their haath aam aadmi ke saath…..

Right, that said I would now like to come back to the actual point of the post which is finding a girl for one of the most eligible bachelors of our country- Rahul Gandhi….. now I don’t do this matrimonial business for every second person but this as you may notice is for the sake of the future of my country…...desh prem ki bhaavna is chalkofying.....almost feel like standing up and singing the National Anthem right away!

Yeah so not getting carried away any further, here is my recommendation for the 5 most eligible ladies suitable for the Chiraag of our nation-:

Mayawati- Isn’t that a fantastic idea to pair the 2 together? I mean think about it…..Rahul will not have to go and spend sleepless nights in Dalit people’s houses trying to prove his love for the poor…..Instead by marrying the leader of their clan, he can manage to make a statement alright…...and as for Maya herself……uske to bhaag hi khul jayenge….to have a stud like gaalo main gadde wala hubby…..he might even convince her to grow her hair and be more presentable……that way our country becomes a more aesthetic place and the UP wala votes also fall straight into the Congress ki jholi……what more could one ask for?

Barbara Mori- Haa haa wahi Brazilian wali Kites ki actress. Of what I am given to understand from the reviews about the movie, it sure looks like her future of a career in Bollywood is that of a stray kati patang…..with a 12 year old son and a quest to find true love in India, she poses as the perfect bride material….weight on her bio data being she is just the right age and with the diverse background of cultures she comes from, the perfect fit to understand our stuff……hamare media se to haath lag hi chuke hai…..Moreover she would keep up the tradition of having a foreigner bahu in the Gandhi family! Hai na perfect?

Mallika Sherawat- The last I heard, she was offered an honorary citizenship in L.A…..In her words, “Would you believe it?” (Answer- It’s difficult to! First Sania gone, now you…..Looks like we have found a way to outsource all our problems!)
Ok on a serious note, she is the perfect sundar and susheel kanya for hamara Rahul….bonus he will probably even get a green card if he takes her in! The next time Shivsena gives him dhamkee, he doesn’t need to travel by cattle class to Daadar….instead he can just take a direct flight to Amreeka!!

Ekta Kapoor- Beechaar!! The woman needs help……because she is single, that means she has a lot of free time…..Idle mind= Devil’s workshop…. Remember, remember??? So if this duo works out, we the janta could get total riddance from crappy saas bahu soaps and immortal heroes. Also the couple in all likelihood would top the Times most powerful couple ka list. Name te Fame. Hor ki mangta hai!

Rani Mukherji- Usko bhool to nahi gaye na? The once upon a time actress who can also play cricket. Now here’s why she is good for Rahul…..One of the many Rahul’s problems was Mayawati accusing him of using ‘scented soap’ after meeting the Dalit folks…..But now with Rani Mukherjee around, he can get loads and loads of freeeee Margo saabun!!!.....thereby doing kitaanuo ka sarvanaash!!

Yes that’s about the list I have managed to compile with great care…..sab ek se ek susheel kanyaaeyy!! Sarvagunn sampan!! Just say the words ‘I do!’

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