Tuesday, April 27, 2010

The MODI Method


If you happen to be the geeky types then the heading might sound to you like a linear programming problem but fear not, I do not discuss such depressing stuff……at least not when I have better things to do…….so in this case the equation being Lalit Modi ka out ya not out wala pending decision, subject to constraints of Shashi Tharoor ka shaap. Here’s the entire story in a simple format for your kind perusal……so lend your eyes for a bit…

They say that hell hath no fury than a woman scorned and nothing more dangerous than a woman wronged but recent events have proved that a man scorned and wronged all at once is not half as un-dangerous (if that’s a word at all)…..Shashi Tharoor being the man in question…..team bhi gayi…..ladki bhi gayi…and naukri bhi gayi……all courtesy Mr. Lalit Modi.

Shashi Ji denied giving Lalit ji’s ‘special Miss Universe friend’ a visa to India…….so Lalit ji getting very angry and feeling pain in heart…..then Lalit Ji promising Gujarat CM Narendra Modi a Gujju IPL team but Shashi Ji coming beech main and spoiling the game by being instrumental in bidding higher and creating Kochi team……sooooo Lalit Ji’s wounds main salt rubbed anything like andddd he doing bhaanda phodna of Shashi Ji’s stake and asking question ki how baba you got so much money??? Bataao bataao…Tell tell…..Shashi Ji feeling too much embarrassed and resigning……but giving solid shaap to Modi Ji……saying Satyanaash ho tera and all……many bad words also….thattt I cannot tell here....

Now his shaap ka energy was so strong that its vibes magnetized my Income tax wala buddies to Lalit Ji’s house itself and they told him…….you uding too much bird like… and demanded disclosures for his own family stake in existing IPL teams….that led to tax raids at all IPL team offices in the country and subsequent spotlight on the BCCI accounts to be made public……now Lalit Ji got little scared…took flight and went to Dubai… as you know, he wasn’t the types to remain silent so he used Twitter as the akhaada for verbal counter attacks…..but BCCI not getting scared by his meek dhamkee’s.

So for the IPL final, Lalit Ji came Zoom se to the D. Y. Patil stadium in a noisy helicopter (hair flying mastt hero like)…..and at the end of the match gave ekdam senti menti speech…..told ki it is my sapna to make a mark in this form of cricket and dedicate my sapna to the people….quoted the Bhagvad Gita also…..yesss he’s the same guy who brought in the concept of cheer leaders……situations have made him a pious man…. kintu parantu….the BCCI on seeing his grand arrival were intimidated and thought ki kal ka meeting if he does muh kholna then everyone’s band bajing sooooo sent him a suspension order by e-mail!!!!!! Awww hamare tech savvy politicians!!!!

This was the story until today and there surely is more to come….looks like its Lalit Ji on strike now and it can only be expected from him to open the face of the bat and maaro a sixer ye ghumaikey…..waiting for this fascinating game to unravel.

One thing is for sure….. if Lalit Ji comes down, then he is not going to do so alone….at least not until he has his pockets loaded with K for Kash…….until then you can almost hear him lip syncing Hugh Grant…….Don’t write me off just yet!

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